INSPIRATION IN 2011

I GET EXCITED WHEN I WRITE MY BLOG SO TODAY IS THE MOST EXCITING OF ALL SO IT WILL BE IN CAPS.

IT TOOK A LONG TIME TO GET TO THE CORE OF SELF AND SEE AND FEEL THE LOVE THAT I NEED TO HAVE FOR MY OWN PROCESS. GETTING THROUGH THE LAYERS OF USE, RELATIONSHIPS, EGO LESSONS, BELIEF SYSTEMS AND LIFETIMES OF LIFE AND DEATH HERE, NOT TO MENTION JUST THE DAY TO DAY ACCUMULATION OF DETRITUS WAS EXHAUSTING. I HAVE BEEN EXHAUSTED IN SO MANY WAYS, FINANCIALLY, ROMANTICALLY, PHYSICALLY, SEXUALLY, MENTALLY BUT NEVER SPIRITUALLY.

I NEVER RUN OUT OF GOD OR WORDS, THEY SEEM TO BE THERE ALL THE TIME. ALWAYS FEELING INSPIRED.

I WAS BULIMIC AS A KID, I HAD AN ABORTION IN MY FIRST MARRIAGE, I LOST MY VIRGINITY ON A DATE RAPE AND I TRIED DRUGS, CIGARETTES AND ALCOHOL TO NUMB ME UP AND DUMB ME DOWN. MY TWO FAVORITE GIRLFRIENDS DIED YOUNG AND SO DID TWO OF MY FAVORITE GUYS, SO DID MY DAD, 51 YEARS AGO ON NEW YEAR'S EVE. THAT BEING SAID, I KNEW ALL ALONG THAT THERE WOULD BE A NEVER ENDING SUPPLY OF INSPIRATION AND I KEPT LOOKING FOR IT AND USING IT TO MY ADVANTAGE.

SUNRISE, SUNSET, PUPPIES AND LITTLE KIDS, HEALING AND SINGING AND THE LIST GOES ON AND ON. I HAVE BEEN INSPIRED BY SO MANY THINGS HERE AND AM SO GRATEFUL THAT I NEVER LOST THAT ABILITY EVEN WHEN I WAS EXHAUSTED.

MY RELATIONSHIPS HAVE TWO QUALITIES, THE FIRST BEING THE FEELING OF BEING INSPIRED.
YOU ALL INSPIRE ME. THE OTHER DAY MY FRIEND SAID "YOU MAKE ME WANT TO BE A BETTER MAN!". WOW. THAT'S A WONDERFUL COMPLIMENT. I WAS GRATEFUL. BEING AN INSPIRATION AND RECEIVING INSPIRATION ARE THE TWO GREATEST FEATURES IN ANY RELATIONSHIP.

SO FOR THIS NEW YEAR OF 2011 LET'S ALL LOOK FOR INSPIRATION. LET'S LOOK AT, EMBRACE AND BE SUPER GRATEFUL FOR ALL THE THINGS IN OUR LIVES THAT LEAVE US INSPIRED TO DO BETTER, BE BETTER AND FEEL BETTER. YOU CAN'T OWN IT OR DEMAND IT, IT IS EITHER THERE OR IT ISN'T. SOME PEOPLE ARE INSPIRED BY CATASTROPHE TO CLEAN IT UP, SOME PEOPLE ARE INSPIRED BY WAR TO BECOME PEACEMAKERS, I PERSONALLY AM INSPIRED BY ILLNESS TO HAVE, BELIEVE IN AND TEACH WELLNESS AND WHOLENESS. I KNOW FOR SURE THAT BEING HUMAN MEANS THAT I HAVE THE ABILITY TO BE INSPIRED AND TO ALSO BECOME AN INSPIRATION. WOW, THAT IS SO GREAT. NO BLAME OR LOSS OR LACK, JUST INSPIRATION, GOING BOTH WAYS.

I FEEL A LOT OF WORDS ABOUT THIS SUBJECT, BUT ENOUGH FOR NOW, HAPPY, HEALTHY, INSPIRED NEW YEAR TO ALL OF YOU, LOVE, DR. SU