Mother, where are you?

My mother was a runner. She ran her whole life from her life. When she finally got caught, she moved her fear and her rage under the rug she called Jesus. That way she did not have to clean up her mess, or apologize, or even simply start fresh and willing in the light as one who wanted to be a loving mother and grandmother. Being accountable for her transgressions on this planet was her responsibility, not his. He would have given her the strength to come clean, tell the whole truth and be fully present, but that was not to be her way. In the end of her life she spent five years in jail, the jail of Alzheimer's reliving her life in state of purgatory, revisiting her own issues untended in her awake life. She tormented those around her with her childish and sometimes cruel behaviors as she lived her undone issues. It is an illusion to think that you can snap your fingers and some rug named Jesus, or any other excuse you name, appears and covers over your mess. Please people, your health, your family, your neighborhood, your earth, your words, each and every single one of them, ARE YOUR RESPONSIBILITY! Not anyone else's! YOU will figure that out soon enough. Being a mother, I knew that if I did not stand fully in the light of God, linking arms with Mary and Jesus as siblings of light, I would not be of much help around here. Please stop insisting that someone else is here to take your test. Or write your paper! Do your own work. That is what you are here to do. If you can not honestly admit your shortcomings now, you will be given time later, and that purgatory of watching the movie of your life over and over and over will seem endless as the Universe will give you that time before you are finished. I love the Creator for the opportunity to be human, to have help in love and light, and to move forward, but they have done THEIR work, now we need to DO OURS! Thank you Jesus, Wade and Dusty, your overlighting love and constant support and inspire me every day to do better, I shall get the job done with your help. Mother, first line of healing, then the rest.